Even if you do, there’s no need to worry or get alarmed. Truth is you are not alone in feeling lonely. Loneliness is a Universal Problem and it’s perfectly natural and normal to feel this way from time to time.
In this article, we will talk about Why We feel empty and lonely and the ways we can overcome our loneliness.
All humans are naturally designed with an emotional hole, a void that we try to fill all our lives but rarely succeed in.
Although you desperately try to fill this void with superficial things like buying a new car, the latest smartphone, new clothes, alcohol, smoking, and sex, you always wake up the next day with the same empty feeling. Nothing seems to work for long.
It doesn’t matter if you are very successful or popular or loved by your family. Feelings of loneliness and emptiness can creep in at any time, crush all other positive feelings, leaving you feeling emotionally crippled, miserable, and lost.
Regardless of what you do in life, you are always stuck with this indescribable feeling that you are missing something in life.
Why do you feel so empty and lonely?
We often think having less or no friends makes us lonely, but it might not really be the case.
Loneliness comes from a lack of connection rather than a lack of friends.
Life is riddled with the brightest days and the darkest nights. And sometimes these dark nights seem to last longer than they should. Certain unfortunate events and experiences like losing a loved one, breakup, toxic relationships, unemployment, and financial losses can make you feel empty and lonely.
However, there can often be more profound reasons for why you feel lonely and empty.
4 core reasons why you feel lonely and empty
1. You lack self-understanding.
When you don’t have a clear idea of who you are or what makes you happy, you will feel a deep void inside of you.
2. You don’t have close connections.
When your relationships lack intimacy you tend to feel more isolated and lonely.
3. You haven’t made peace with your past.
There are certain unresolved emotions from your past that are still lingering in your present.
4. You lack a purpose in life.
When you are not passionate about achieving something you might feel lethargic and unmotivated all the time.
Whatever the reason be for your loneliness, you can take some positive steps to feel less empty and lonely.
11 ways to feel less lonely
Whether you are going through a breakup, alone in a new city, or just going through a rough patch, there are always things you can do to feel less lonely and isolated.
Here are 11 ways you can start overcoming your loneliness:
1. Acknowledge your emotions
For most of us, accepting and embracing our true emotions can be difficult and scary. It is not something we are familiar with or taught to do well.
Instead of denying your pain, tell yourself that things are not okay right now. But they can be.
An excellent way to overcome loneliness and process our emotions is to start Journaling
Writing down our thoughts and emotions on a piece of paper often helps us get more clarity and reach conclusions that might not have been realized otherwise.
2. Get comfortable with Yourself
Can you expect anyone to like you if you don’t enjoy your own company? Unless you learn how to be alone with yourself, you will always struggle with feelings of emptiness and loneliness.
Accept yourself for who you are with all your imperfections and flaws. Embrace your uniqueness and love yourself unconditionally.
When you’re comfortable with yourself, you stop comparing yourself to others, and this in a way builds your self-esteem.
3. Make space for some ‘Me Time’ in your daily routine
Spending time with others is fun. But when you allot a major chunk of your time to your job, housework, kids and family, you hardly find any time for yourself.
‘Me time’ is perhaps the most essential part of your day. Spending time alone doing what you like, or maybe just having a cup of coffee by yourself, helps you introspect your day and brings clarity to your life. You feel less confused and don’t look for diversions to occupy your mind.
4. Keep Your Body Fit
A healthy body leads to a healthy mind. In our race to fill our minds with people, substances, activities, or things we end up neglecting our body and mind.
Workouts not only transform your body but also boosts your self-esteem and builds self-confidence. You feel more confident in interacting with people, less stressed, and empty.
You can do Yoga, Exercise, Lift Weights, Walk, Run, Jog, Zumba, or any other physical activity you prefer. Just keep your body fit in your own style.
Drink lots of water, get good sleep, and have a balanced diet.
Remember, when you take care of your body, your mindset transforms by eradicating all negative feelings.
Work on yourself and experience the joy of being your authentic self.
5. Be Open, say ‘Yes’ to Opportunities
When we are trapped in the clutches of loneliness, we often refuse opportunities to socialize or spend time with our loved ones.
Force yourself to step out and meet the people who matter to you at least once a month.
Visit your parents or meet up with your siblings, cousins, and friends. You can also plan and organize social activities on a weekly basis.
Connect with your loved ones in an honest and open way. It might be difficult initially depending on your dynamics with your friends and family, but communicating honestly and regularly with your near and dear ones can help strengthen and improve the quality of your relationships.
6. Do what you enjoy
Do you love cooking? Or do you love eating good food? Do you enjoy watching movies or reading books? Or do you enjoy lifting weights? Or perhaps gardening? All of us have something we enjoy doing. And one of the best ways to stop feeling lonely is to get rid of boredom by doing what you enjoy the most. It can be absolutely anything in the world, as long as it makes you feel better.
7. Create Something
You can choose to get creative and start working on a new project that you’ve been planning for ages. You can choose to paint, illustrate, write fiction, try a new recipe, create music, sing, dance, do embroidery, create a LEGO masterpiece or whatever that allows you to express yourself and use your creative skills.
8. Own a pet
Humans and animals share a unique connection. Dogs, cats, and other pets can make us feel loved and cared for. They can even help us cope with stress, anxiety, and depression. If you own a pet, then make sure to spend more time with them. In case you don’t, you can always adopt one from your local animal shelter.
If you don’t wish to take the responsibility of a pet just yet, you can volunteer at your nearby animal shelter or ask your friends and neighbors to walk their dogs.
If you are feeling empty and isolated, then volunteering can help you find a new purpose in life. By stepping out and connecting with others who are less fortunate, you will gain a new perspective in life.
It will help you gain a newfound respect for yourself, the people around you, and your community. You can offer your volunteering services at your local charities, childcare centers, nursing homes, and soup kitchens.
Make a list of everything that you are thankful for in life. It can be the smallest of things or your greatest achievements. Simply note down the things you are grateful for before going to bed and keep adding to your list every night.
This will help to remind you of all the good things in your life and get you into a positive mindset before you sleep.
11. Be mindful
Bring your awareness into the present moment. Give your full attention to what you’re doing at any given moment.
Whether you’re creating a presentation or having your dinner, be aware of all the sensations, thoughts, and emotions surrounding that experience. Be intentional about how you live your life. When you live your life in auto-pilot mode or if you are always distracted, you will miss out on the best parts about life and end up feeling empty.
Mindfulness takes practice and patience. Practice mindfulness meditation for 10 minutes every day and be more present in your life. Soon you will realize that what you mistakenly believed to be loneliness, was solitude all along. Mindfulness will allow you to reflect on your thoughts and perceptions and realize how you are evolving every single day.
All of us feel lonely at times. But it doesn’t have to pull you down and make you feel lost and empty.
Being aware of your emotions, embracing them, accepting yourself unconditionally, and taking a few positive steps can help you overcome loneliness and reduce feelings of isolation and emptiness.